Why did the chicken cross the road?

She lost her way, wasn't going anywhere, she's not a young chicken any more. Such is life.
By the time you know your way around, you're not heading anywhere.
Pessimist

The subconscious took over; this chicken doesn't know why she had to cross the road; her ego is weaker than her id and her superego.
Psychoanalyst

Chickens can't think, they don't apply their mind to road-crossing, they have a small brain. This chicken also has neurological difficulty.
Cognitivist

She is a violent, unstable and anti-social chicken. Good citizens pushed her across the border.
Stickler for Discipline

For years she was lonely, depressed. Then someone friendly waved to her from the other side of the road and, before you could say 'Jack Robinson' she was there. Furthermore, she has no intention of returning, she took her belongings; she left for good, I wish her the best.
Optimist

I was watching the road with my binoculars and saw what happened. A rooster came first, then the chicken - followed by 8 chicks! I have my religious moments, this was one of them.
Naturalist

This chicken was probably deprived of grain and had lost weight so she approached the food on the other side of the road. My colleagues and I recorded pigeons working for grain in the laboratory; this behavior is a typical result of reinforcement schedules.
Animal conditioner

She was scared. The way this chicken was running and screeching and flapping her wings,
anyone could see she was scared. My dad reckons all chickens are lily-livered.
Tom, the farmer's son

What a question! Why don't they ask the chicken? She could tell you a few things about how they treat chickens over there. No wonder she left.
Feminist

They should let animals move in a big Skinner box if they want to know why this chicken, or any
chicken for that matter, moves across roads, rivers, valleys, mountains. It's normal for creatures
who look ahead, haven't forgotten their recent history, and are able to hear good things coming.
Long-winded radical behaviorist


This chicken saw trees, green meadows, flowers, butterflies, she heard birds singing and bees humming and a cock crowing - of course she was attracted across the road.  She understood
her chicks will have a decent life.
Environmentalist


Let's have a lot of helpful ideas on how to keep chickens happy and healthy!